| What do
you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish |
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| She is In The House! Comments: Yo
Mommas so fat when she jumped in the ocean all the whale sang "We Are
Family!" Contributor :
Animous |
| THE BIG ONE Henry's son David come home one evening balling his eyes out, to his
mother. His mother asked him what happened so he said," Well when me and
daddy were fishing he got a big one and when he was reeling it in the busted
and the fish got away." His mother said," well son that's nothing to cry
about. You should have just laughed it out and went on." David said," But
that's what I did.
Contributor : Bill Spence |
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| Give a man a fish and he will live for a day.
Teach a man how to fish and he will... Every day |
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| If you give a man a fish he will eat for a
day. If you teach a man to fish he will drink beer, tell lies and wear a
stupid hat. |
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| What did the salmon say when he ran into a
concrete barrier? "Dam!" |
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| big one always gets away
Comments: How big was the fish you caught?
I don't know, there was one on this side of the boat & one eye on the
other side. Needless to say he got away.
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Where
do shellfish go to borrow money ?
To the prawn broker ! |
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What
do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse ?
The Codfather ! |
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How
could the dolphin afford to buy a house ?
He prawned everything ! |
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Which
fish can perform operations ?
A Sturgeon ! |
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What
happened to the shark who swallowed a bunch of keys ?
He got lockjaw ! |
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Where
do fish wash ?
In a river basin ! |
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Why
did the whale cross the road ?
To get to the other tide ! |
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Where
do little fishes go every morning ?
To plaice school ! |
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What
fish goes up the river at 100mph ?
A motor pike ! |
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What
do you get from a bad-tempered shark ?
As far away as possible ! |
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What did
the sardine call the submarine ?
A can of people ! |
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What's
the difference between a fish and a piano ?
You can't tuna fish ! |
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Why are
sardines the stupidest fish in the sea ?
Because they climb into tins, close the lid and
leave teh key outside ! |
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What do
you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much ?
A beer-a-cuda ! |
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Who has
eight guns and terrorises the ocean ?
Billy the Squid ! |
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What
happened to the cold jellyfish ?
It set ! |
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What's
the coldest fish in the sea ?
A blue whale ! |
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Where do
you find a down-and-out octopus ?
On squid row ! |
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What do
you get if you cross an abbot with a trout ?
Monkfish ! |
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What kind
of fish will help you hear better ?
A herring aid ! |
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